Why Food is the Fabric of Life

How Food has Defined Who I Date

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“I am not a dog, I do not see food as a reward,” my friend once said to me. Her comment shattered my soul. I thought to myself. I was horrified at the thought of it, and for awhile, I silenced my obsession with food…well at least around her.

I have been obsessed with food, for as long as I can remember. I am always thinking of my next great meal and have never said no to anything fabulously fried, with love.

My love affair with food impacts and controls every aspect of my life, seriously.

My love affair with food determines who I date and how serious we get because if you do not share my obsession with food, our relationship will be fleetingly short.

I once decided not to go on a second date with a guy because he ordered a quesadilla on our first date.

He then proceeded to tell me that he is not much of a “food person and eats for sustenance, and not for pleasure.”

Ummmm………are you a robot? Are you from the future? Do you prefer your protein in pellets? I could barely get through my meal with him. Him, eating quesadilla, I was unattracted to him. Nothing he could have said would have salvaged said social situation.

A quesadilla is something you only make at home, from the fabulous leftovers of a well barbequed chicken thigh or slow roasted pulled pork, something you order at a restaurant. You do not pay for a quesadilla, unless you are in a Mexican restaurant, known for their quesadilla making skills, a chain restaurant like …gross.

Another guy, who only made it to date number one, ordered for me.

Just let that sink into your psyche for awhile….

He ordered terribly too and I barely remember what we talked about because I was too busy fuming from the inside out. He ordered hot chicken wings, yam fries and spinach dip. I also think he might of had a slight drug addiction because he went to the bathroom like seven times, over the course of our meal and sniffled a lot, but that was not what I remembered. What I remembered was his terrible food order choices.

I remember asking him, “Thanks for letting me order some appies as well.”

I know, I know, so gross and passive aggressive, but I could not help myself!

“I thought it would be nice to share some small plates, rather than order our own meals,” he said smiling at me, having no idea what I was thinking and how frustrated I was, at a ruined night out. What a waste of makeup, was another thought I was having.

I was deprived of the chance to order, at a restaurant I had been more excited to go to, than the date itself. I had pre-checked the menu and had already decided what I had wanted to order and he that! I wanted to order the chicken and waffles, with the blueberry compote. I never did get to try their waffles….woe is me.

I am a food snob, but of the rare breed. I can appreciate a bucket of fried chicken, just as much as a ten course meal, at a Michelin, five star restaurant.

I know the value of the dingy, borderline dirty restaurant, where the lack of visual appeal is made up for by the pleasantries on the plates presented to you. I am willing to stand in line, for a very long time, for a beloved food truck invention and I am more than willing to happily add the calories for the colossal food explosion in my mouth.

Now, when I met my life partner, I knew I had hit the jackpot.

On our second date he took me to this fabulous Chinese restaurant. He ordered the calamari, African chicken, apricot prawns, and beef dish off the menu. The server knew him and I was happy to let him order; I actually insisted because I knew I was in good company.

The restaurant was in Chinatown, another plus, and was terribly decorated. You know the food is good when the establishment does not give a shit if the chairs are comfy, if the bathroom is dingy or if the lighting is not mood alluring. I was pumped and falling madly in love.

My partner taught me and introduced me to so many types of food. I have learned to love pho, even tripe, dried fish spices, calf hoof and so much more.

Is this the only reason I love him? Obviously not, but if you have been reading along, it clearly helps.

Food has always been my number one requirement when dating. If you love food, will try anything and everything and will join me on the food obsessed journey, we will definitely get to date number two.

If you do not like food so much, or do not think about it on the regular, we might run out of things to talk about very quickly.

I have often wondered, if I did not value food the way I do, would I be with someone different? How has this obsession directed my life?

I am not sure where this obsession comes from, but I truly find it is one of the essential cornerstones of my romantic relationships.

At least four times a week, I text “What are we going to have for din din tonight?”

When I am in the company of a food lover, I see an adventurous person. I see someone who is willing to try new things, who is open to new experiences and one who understands there is so much more to learn in life. A person who is open to different cultures of food shows me their understanding and respect for different cultures, upbringings and ideas.

Food makes the world go round. Food brings people closer together. Food is what unites us all. Food makes me happy.

Food is the fabric of life.

Written by

I write about issues that are near and dear to my heart, with the hope that my stories, experiences, and struggles may empower others: amanlitt.ca

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