Writing online has been a great experience for me, but not for everyone (or one person) who knows me.
Some people feel threatened by the words I cast off into the ether. They do not like that I am telling my story because most of my stories involve other people. Sometimes, out of love, a person will tell me to ‘not write this’ or ‘edit that’ because they are trying to protect me or themselves.
I do not use people’s real names when I write. I write a lot of things in an edited reality, so that people do not know who I am really talking about.
Some of my stories are not even my stories entirely. They are stories I have picked up on the journey of life, but write, from my own perspective, so that the words flow more freely.
I still try meticulously hard to be careful about what I write. I ensure I change names, environments, cities, anything that might harm a person or person I use to know.
It is still threatening to some people.
They do not like that I am sharing my stories online, for the entire world to see. I like to remind them that, first of all, the entire world is not reading my blog, but thank you for the ego boost. My entire family does not even read my blog. I do not even know if my dad knows what a blog is, to be honest.
It does not scare me, when others are threatened by what I am doing, but it does make me wonder why they feel so threatened.
I am more than okay with sharing my scars, struggles and stories with whomever is interested in reading them. I try to tell my life experiences without any harm to people who have been a part of my life.
I think, when someone who knows me, reads my work and sees themselves in my story, sirens go off. They feel like their name is on a billboard or that I am shouting their personal business from a rooftop, but I do not feel that I am doing that.
What I have learned, in my limited lifetime, is that you have to lean into the fear. When someone tries to control you, lean into the fear. When someone tries to stop you, lean into the fear.
An ex of mine recently messaged me, threatening that if I write about my past relationship anymore, they would publicly humiliate me.
I am an online writer. I publicly humiliate myself all the time, so the threat was not as mighty, as they might have anticipated. What I also found funny was that they thought they could still control me, from afar, via the online world. Why would I listen to you or your threats?
I also find it so funny that this person is so threatened by my measly blog, or ‘little blog’ as they phrase it. If it is so insignificant, why do they care what I write about at all?
Control is a dangerous disease. People who want to control you are actually afraid of you and your power. Do not let them own your life.
This person, who thinks what I am doing is so insignificant, yet they are there, hidden away, reading every line I write. Who is worse? Me for writing or them for reading?
I own my side of the story. I know that I am not trying to cause anyone harm, but if they deem my writing harmful, that is their situation to deal with and definitely not mine.
Your story is just that; it is your story. Do not bow down to another person’s needs of you.
Live your life, tell your story, be your honest self.
If someone chooses to slander you, let them, the people who love you know your truth.
Own your story and let them own theirs.
Is anyone else out there dealing with this? Any advice?