Stella, thank you so much for your honesty. I know that every text and word I say to my friend right now is falling on deaf ears. Our relationship is growing tense and she is becoming more and more defensive. I was so angry at her yesterday, but I knew my feelings were directed at the wrong person.

I find what you said about any attention being better than no attention. I find it hard to believe that being treated badly is better than nothing at all, but I am learning.

I really want to make sure that I can maintain the friendship, so I am going to back off for a bit. Her justifications for him are driving me crazy! It always feels like she’s protecting him and his bullshit behaviour because he is going through so much ‘stuff,’ but aren’t we all?

I really appreciate your feedback and I think I am just going to steer clear of the conversation of ‘him’ for awhile because I do not want to blow our relationship up for someone who I do not even deem worthy of my time….but I struggle.